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Please join me on a journey from grief to surrender, from fear to empowerment, from uncertainty to.... uncertainty. 
"When you become comfortable with uncertainty, infinite possibilities open up in your life."  ​
~Eckhart Tolle

Start Living Your Perfect Life

8/17/2016

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Last week I posted about the moment I realized my life is perfect, and since then I’ve begun to experience such a profound shift that I would be remiss not to share the insights which got me here.  What if we could all realize that life, in this moment, is exactly as it should be? 
 And this is not to say that life, in this moment, is necessarily joyous or easy.  A life worth living is, in fact, rarely these two things.  Life is hard, and messy, and complicated.  Often it is disappointing, frustrating, and tiring.  Sometimes it is excruciatingly painful.  But in order make our ascent up this mountain, in order to reach the summit and earn those expansive views, we will need to work, and we will need to endure the climb.  How we choose to experience this journey is a state of mind.
 
Here is my approach to seeing life’s perfection: ​
​

​Embrace the Gift of Adversity
Pain and suffering are unavoidable.  Nobody, not even the most enlightened among us, is immune to hardship, heartbreak and disappointment.  The conditioned societal reaction is to avoid these things, to reject their presence in our lives, and to give them names like “bad”, “horrible”, “unfortunate”.  But these circumstances, and our innate and intelligent human ability to process and overcome them, are fertile grounds for personal growth and transformation.  There is no better way to access your deep well of courage and compassion than to face pain and suffering, to walk through the fire with trust and conviction, believing that you are worth the gifts that lie beyond the hurt.  And the greater the pain, the greater the opportunity to become more magnificent than you ever thought possible.  So the next time something “bad” happens, do allow and acknowledge the pain, do acknowledge the suffering, and also acknowledge the gift of invaluable wisdom, experience and transformation that you have been chosen to receive.
 
Accept Impermanence
There is nothing more certain than change.  Every second, our physical bodies are changing.  Our thoughts are changing.  The world outside is changing.  The state you are in, at this very moment, is singular and fleeting.  If life seems hard, know that it will not remain this way.  Know that every difficult moment brings with it the gift of gratitude, because there is no gratitude without hard work.  Surrender to the moment and accept it as a necessary step towards your evolution. 
 
If life is feeling particularly joyful, know that this, too, will not last.  Accept this as readily and peacefully as you accept the impermanence of hard times.  Do not fear the end, and do not attach to the present.  Appreciate your good fortune without projecting into the future, and allow gratitude to flood these moments of joy.  Every ending is a new beginning.  Through peaceful observation and non-attachment, we can recognize each moment for its perfection in the whole of our lives.

Happiness is a State of Being, not an Emotion
We chase after happiness as if it's an emotional state that can be acquired and owned, and when we feel stress or disappointment instead of joy and excitement we feel we are failing at life.  But true happiness is not defined by just one emotion ("happiness").  It is not dependent on extrinsic factors such as whether we get that promotion, or that puppy, or that chocolate.  True happiness is a state of being, of knowing that we are living our truth and following the path that calls us from within.  In this state we may feel a range of both positive and negative emotions from joy and excitement to disappointment, frustration, and even fear, but we recognize the necessity of all these emotions in the landscape of our chosen life. 
 
When we consciously choose the direction of our life, we find meaning.  Within that meaning lies the peace and contentment of knowing that life in this moment, despite the pain of the past, the discomfort of the present and the desires of the future, is perfect.  And if we know we are not leading by conscious choice, but rather by fear and doubt, isn’t it exciting to know that a whole new life awaits?
 
Of course, all of this takes practice and observation.  Much of the time, we are so immersed in our experience that we cannot see the gifts of adversity, the impermanence of the present, or the happiness beneath the struggle.  But the more we can tune our awareness and see the perfection in our lives, the more peaceful, courageous, and inspired we will become.  And that’s good for everyone.
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    Joanne Chang is a writer, mother, widow and movement-maker.  She lives in Denver, CO.

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